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A weekly opinion column published Wednesday argued that dolphins, despite a widespread reputation for intelligence, are held back by two structural limitations: choosing to inhabit water while breathing air, and the absence of hands.
OutKick writer Matthew Reigle, in his recurring "Gripe Report" column, used the summer season as a framework for cataloging animal frustrations ranging from a Florida ant invasion to what he described as unresolved and contradictory public guidance on surviving bear encounters.
Dolphins: Smart, But Not Applying It Reigle acknowledged first-hand experience with dolphins — he swam with them and described one pulling him around a lagoon — but maintained their intelligence is functionally limited by circumstance.
His core argument: no genuinely smart animal would elect to live permanently in an environment incompatible with its own respiratory system.
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